How a change in your eating pattern with a person can signify changing patterns in your relationship with them?
We all eat food, different kinds of food with different kinds of people but, do you look on the fact with whom you are eating with? How your mood turns towards your food and appetite when eating with someone you like, love, or a not too close person?
Your nature towards food changes with the environment and person you are eating with. Imagine yourself in a fancy restaurant with your loved one, the hot food, the cold dessert and wine with that person will be enjoyed with talks and laughs. You will enjoy that ambience and company.
Now, just change the person from your loved one to a stranger (more of a client meeting or official meets). Your approach to food will be low maybe you will just order and eat what the other one prefers and the talk would be all work i.e. not an enjoyable meal to remember. You won’t certainly call that person again and ask to join you on a meal. No, of course not! Because it was a meal which was not even of your choice, a talk not much of your interest and a place which you no longer find so soothing as you did with the loved one.
Want to track how good your relationship with one is going?
Focus on your eating habits with them. Notice how often do you eat together, how you feel sharing your meal and meal time together. It could be your parents, partner, friends, etc .If it’s good and regular then voila! you have a good environment around you also someone you love. But if the thing goes the other way like, avoiding them during meals, avoid having conversation during and meals and leave as soon as you are done, skipping meals in order to avoid them also counts in. This describes how is the current equation of your with that person.
Why does the change occurs?
I guess the reason to why this happens is easy, a break in the chain of your relation. Giving a personal experience, trust and crack in faith was the reason for me to avoid having meals with my some people. Even if I would spend my entire day with them I would run off (not literally) during meal times.
As far as I have understood, meals are the most intimate forms to show one your affection, love and unspoken warm gestures. Because you take out time, free your mind, schedule your meal time in advance just to be able to spend it with that person. You don’t just eat but share your warmth with each other through that recently served hot food. You share your words and take a peek into each other’s life like you taste the food from the other one’s plate. You cherish the company as much as you cherish the ambience and the aroma of the food that leaves it’s essence on you. And that’s what makes it a properly enjoyed meal. A well deserved meal.
A meal that leaves an everlasting taste on you is a perfect meal for both, your body and soul.
Is eating alone not a great sign of not being able to enjoy your meal?
Well it depends upon what your soul is into. Some eat alone because they want to avoid eating with others as I mentioned earlier. While some love eating alone because they find it soothing and are comforted with their own company.
As many say that people should spend some time with themselves to know more about what they think, like, dislike and other intimate or personal preference things. I suggest you to use your meal time to do it. Eat your meals alone from time to time and discover new and variant sides of you.
But don’t forget, there’s a difference between being alone and being lonely. Try to fall in between the letters of alone than lonely. It will be hard but you will soon reach the ‘a’ if don’t give up.
For me eating and enjoying alone is beautifully shown in the first scene of Audrey Hepburn’s Breakfast at Tiffany’s. The first frame of the film shows a yellow taxi stopped in front of the jewellery shop ‘Tiffany’ and Audrey Hepburn making her way out of it to the window where a jewellery is being exhibited. Her black dress and tidy bun compliments her as she starts her date with the exhibits, she takes out a croissant from her bag and takes a bite of it, then takes a sip of her coffee. That look and feel of her eating in front of the exhibit before the city wakes is not of lonely but a choice of being alone. She looks satisfied with the company she has to share her breakfast with. Which, for me is more that enough for someone to enjoy their time and meals with. A meal enjoyed alone than a meal forcefully eaten with.
My understanding of food psychology
I recently watched this healing Korean drama named “Dinner mate” or “Would you like have dinner together?”. I did say this particular show made me realise and for the first time made me question myself that how important is it to see and notice that who you are spending and eating your meals with. This understanding made me realise why I had a sudden run off from the people I once loved sharing my time and meals with.
Coming to the plot of the drama, the story revolves around a show producer and a food psychologist who meet under weird circumstances and end up eating together. They part their ways only to end up meeting and eating again, that’s when they decide to become dinner mates. A mate whom you only have dinner with, you won’t know each other’s personal information like name, profession, etc, etc. These two might be the leads of the series but the story isn’t just about them. As I said, its a healing drama, and healing dramas are know for how they unfold the story with not just the main leads but with every character they have in it. It’s like everyone has a story, and everyone gets their chance and time to tell it to you. The more you watch it, start understanding it, it won’t be just a drama to you anymore. (The songs are also really groovy and enjoyable!)
Plus one thing I really loved was how they used the Audrey Hepburn’s Breakfast at Tiffany’s first scene by recreating it by the drama’s female lead as she side by side decodes it in the way I did above. I guess one of my favourite scenes from the drama which also kept me hooked with it from the first frame.
P.S: I personally adore this poster a lot!
Ending my blog here all I want to say is that, I hope you always have a good and healthy meal which feeds your body and soul both. 안녕!
